Why do we play sports, really? Sure, talk all day about fitness and teamwork and all that stuff. We all know the truth: we play for glory. When you play a game that not many people know about, glory is in short supply. That’s simply because the ones you’re bragging to about playing hurling and camogie don’t know just how freakin’ hard it is.
You have to tell them. You have to make them see that you’re putting your life on the line even when playing a quick stick toss with friends. Knowing how to make the most of every brag is the only way to get the glory in the shortest amount of time. Start at the easiest and work your way up.
More Miles Run Each Match
While there’s no actual data for hurling, someone did add up how much Gaelic football players run during a match. Apparently, women run almost 6 miles per GAA match, and men average just over 7 miles. That’s not taking into account the fact that the sliotar tends to travel farther than the football during play, which would probably require a bit more running for both women and men. Compare that to the usual “tough guy/girl” sport of rugby and you’re set for bragging.
Of course, without a solid stat, your bragging is open to interpretation. Just remember to point out that the interpretation skews in your favor no matter how you look at it.
No Pads Required
Look, the essence of hurling is that everyone gets a stick, and they swing that stick hard enough to send a ball flying at speeds of nearly 100 miles per hour. One would think that protective gear would be a must. Instead, hurlers just wear helmets. And most hurlers didn’t wear a helmet until they became a requirement in 2010. And even then, some hurlers quit the game because wearing a helmet was a sissy thing to do.
Don’t want to look like a sissy? Brag that you don’t have to wear protective gear. Show off those bruises, which you will definitely have earned.
Immense Skill Necessary
Among the many skills you had to learn to play hurling and camogie, the solo was probably the one that filled you with the greatest amount of pride. When bragging about your sporting abilities, opening with the solo is not a bad place to start. What other sport requires you to balance a ball on the end of a stick while running as fast as you possibly can?
That’s right, baby. Brag away.
Your first broken stick is something to memorialize. That blessed pile of toothpicks means you were in there, fighting it out with all your might. You went up against other players of immense skill, and the power on the field was just so much that neither hurley could handle it. Sure, sticks are expensive, but for that first one, you’re just gonna want to mount it on your wall as a reminder of the day you became a MONSTER.
Unheard of Injuries
Sure, you might get a run-of-the-mill ACL injury here and there, but for the most part, hurling and camogie injuries are in a class all their own. If you want to impress whomever you’re talking to at the bar, roll up those sleeves and unzip those boots to show off bruises in places you never knew existed. And if that doesn’t do the trick, just show them these.
And if you really want to get the point across, if you really want to make sure everyone around you knows you’re playing the greatest game in the world: